Paci

Paci magic..... Izzy made her paci disappear last night.... I search around her little screaming body for 15 min, then I walked over to the light switch and turned it on.... It was at that moment the magic was demistified.....and I learned..... When in doubt or suspecting baby paci magic turn on the light and look on the floor.... She most likely threw the blasted thing out of frustration. And thereby ended the magical mystical abality of my 6 month old little girl making her paci disappear from her mouth and reappear in random places.... Over her head, on the floor, ect.

Long days.....

Today was  a good day!

Izzy spent her first day with Aunt Joyce and Uncle Bob, and I think they spoiled each other!

So our day started at 6 am with a hungry fussy baby, who got fed and everyone went back to sleep.  Then at 9 she was dropped off at Aunt Joyce's house while I went off to work.  When I came back at 3ish to get her I learned she and Uncle Bob took a walk, and played with the 18ish month old little girl next door who wasn't sure about Cheyanne.  They sat on the porch swing and talked most ofthe afternoon, and she only took little baby catnaps, we'll call them kitten naps.  She ate like a champ! 5oz of formula and a whole 1st stage jar of baby food, rice cereal and whatever else she was fed!

I got home about 5, Robbie came home at 6 and I went back to work till 915, which means daddy gave her a bottle AND babyfood! He does so much with her it's great!

I fed her a bedtime bottle, story, cuddles, prayers and put her to bed. She passed out quickly and with minimal fighting!

I had a good day at work.  Robbie had a good day at work.  But most importantly, Izzy had a great day with Aunt Joyce, Uncle Bob, Mommy, and Daddy!

Today was a good day.

-- Sent from my Palm Prē

Izzy's Impact

We met up with a friend from the NICU about a week ago.  I didn't realize how much of an impression Izzy made on all the nurses!

One of our fav nurses has kept up with us, and with Izzy.  Izzy went straight to her! It was great! She remembered that for 5 weeks her favorite nurse would visit and cuddle every chance she got.

In our short get together I learned the impact Izzy had on all the nurses.  They ask about the squirt, and remember her.  They remember her head full of hair, little button nose, bright blue eyes and HUGE personality.  Every day a NICU nurse comes into work I learn that they all had trouble walking by Izzy's crib.  One nurse said when you walked by and those big blue inquisitive eyes followed you, it was impossible to walk past without talking to or cuddling with her!

I know new parent thinks their little one is the cutest, most intriging with the cutest best biggest personality.  I still think that, however, I know I'm a new parent with a skewed opinion.  The only difference is, I have tons of nurses that agree she's a cute baby with a great personality.

-- Sent from my Palm Prē

Dr. Van Hook

 Izzy had an appointment with Dr. Van Hook today, and daddy was in tow this time!  She's 12 lbs and 24 inches!  We're going to start doing part of her breathing treatment in the morning and all of it at night to help keep her airways clear.



Today was a good day.

-- Sent from my Palm Prē

New Old School

I recently got a facebook message from a friend who said something along the lines of "Hey! I saw you were cloth diapering! I loved my bumGenuis diapers when A was a baby! I was a breastfeeding, cloth diapering, baby wearing mama. It's so fab!"

That got me thinking about other messages I've gotten and comments about my parenting choices.......

Choice 1. I breastfed Izzy till she wouldn't nurse and I stopped producing.  
     We got her about a month past her last surgery on breast milk.  Frozen, pumped, fresh or in conjunction with formula, but we got there.  I even still have some saved specifically for her cereal.  This decision was very important to me, especially after we got a diagnosis.  I researched all the pros and cons, benefits and risks.  I found benefit after benefit and the only con/ risk was the time and eating restrictions.  I really wanted to give my baby the best possible start and see what all the hype was about with the bond between mother and breastfed baby.
     I worked hard to keep her off formula at first, then realized it can be a sanity saver!  It was sometimes easier for Robbie to make a bottle of formula in the middle of the night than for me to sit and listen to a hungry, crying baby while the milk took it's dear sweet time warming.  She didn't get many bottles of straight formula at first.  It was strictly to fortify and save mommy and daddy.
     I realized that before formula mothers had no choice, and "If it aint broke don't fix it" instantly came to mind.  There's a reason older generations have lower instances of breast cancer, and babies didn't get sick as often.  Breast feeding a baby lowers mom's chances of developing breast cancer, it does the same for breast fed daughters.  And that's all in addition to passing on vital antibodies, vitimans, and baby age and need specific milk to baby.  It worked in centuries past for queens, their court and peasents alike, why think that I'm too good to breastfeed? Plus we saved on formula for the most part!

Choice 2.  I cloth diaper Izzy. Most of the time. Ok.... As much as I can.
     As soon as I found out I was pregnant, I started research about cloth.  I knew I wanted to save money and not literally throw it in the trash.  I was terrified that if I chose cloth it would be prefolds and plastic pants like our grandparents.  I was thrilled when I found Kellyscloset.com and the great selection of cloth they offer!   
     The hospital sent Izzy home in 'sposies, like they do all babies.  We used them while she had her ostomy, but I tried to use cloth as much as possible.  I wanted to positively impact the environment.  I also wanted my daughter to be able to grow up environmentally.  We still use 'sposies, but I am SLOWLY adding to my fluff stash, and incorporating cloth into her daily routine.
     Disposable diapers are relatively new.  Being that we live in a disposeable age, it only makes since that our babies start the initiation from the get go.  Yeah, sposies are trim and kinda convient... But cloth is so much cuter! Less expensive, and better for everyone!

Choice 3.  I wear my wrap and Izzy thinks she belongs in it.
     My sis-in-law gave me what we jokingly called a "make-your-own gift" for my baby shower.  It included patterns, a wrap, a sling, and a notebook.  I thought it was cute and funny.  Little did I know that these would become staples in my daily life with my baby.  I don't really use the sling, and haven't busted out the patterns yet.  I do use my wrap.  I now have 3.  I LOVE my wrap and almost couldn't live without it.
     Mothers have been baby wearing for centuries!  This "fad" is not a new one.  It used to be the only way that a mother could do anything with her child and still have hands to do something else.  Mothers would wear their baby and work in fields, or around the village.  Again, if it worked for everyone in the past, why should I think I'm too good to do it.
     We have in inadvertently taught Izzy that when we are out she belongs in her wrap.  She LOVES it!  She can see what's going on, be a part of it, and not get moved out of the way.  It's wonderful!

So the "old school" way of doing things, with natural things, is the way that I have chosen to raise my daughter.

Holley, I'm right there with you... happily I'm a breast feeding, cloth diapering, baby wearing mama.  I don't do it for the fad, I don't do it for the history, I don't do it for the convenience or cost.  I do it for my daughter, my environment, and my family.  My old school choices, although they have a new school spin (new patterns, swim wraps, pumps, ect.) still positively affect the environment and don't add to our landfills.

Beach Baby

The fastest way to a passed out baby.... Short trip to the beach for the first time.

Today was a great end to my birthday weekend!  We got up, took Izzy to her 6 month check up and she's 11 lbs 13 oz!!!!!!!! 23.5 inches!  Then it was off to Subway for brunch.  We headed home to change clothes and off to the beach!  We took Izzy to the island for the first time during the day.  We went to Casino beach so that we could put our stuff under the pier and play in the water.  Izzy was decked out in her white circo tank, carters sandles, flopy sun hat, childrens place shades and kissaluvs diaper cover.  She ruled the beach!

We lotioned up the baby so she wouldn't get sun burnt and then it was off to the water!  We sat and played for a while, then rinsed off and came home.  I've enjoyed my baby girl smelling like the beach all day long! We tried to get her to pick out a shell for her scrapbook... But she wouldn't, she was distracted by sand.

Izzy was asleep in my arms until we got to the showers.  Then she was all but asleep in daddy's arms.  Robbie put her in her carseat and she passed out before we could get her in the car.  She's been asleep ever since, with the exception of a quick "feed me now!" session, she's been out for the count all day.

I love the smell of baby.  I love the smell of the beach! So what could be better than a beach baby smell?!  If only I could bottle it.

-- Sent from my Palm Prē

I tried to post these last night but sent it to the wrong email.... So here are some pic that will be moved to the post they correspond to.

-- Sent from my Palm Prē

Today

Today is a bad day. Izzy is great... She's off with Aunt DJ and Xan on a field trip for home schooling, I guess. It's a bad day for me.

Nothing different has or will happen today. We got up, fed Izzy, got dressed. DJ got Izzy and I got dressed and am on the way to work. I'll walk in, smile, help moms-to-be find outfits that fit and look cute and go home. I'll feed Izzy, do the dishes start laundry and make dinner. It's a normal day. I'll do her breathing treatment, bedtime bottle, bath and put her to bed. But today is a bad day.

Last night I found a kid's blog that is 6 years younger than me and has CF. His lung function is only 20% and he's been turned down for a transplant. He's 19 and essentially he's dying trapped in his own young body unable to breathe. I know he is not my 6 month old daughter. I know right now she's fine. But I also know his present could be her future.

Her doctors and social workers and nurses and everyone tell me I'm very well adjusted and strong. They don't see the put together mommy cry all the way to work or break down from stress and fear of what the future hold for her darling daughter.

Yup, today is a bad day. But like every other day, the sun will rise, the sun will set.

I'll put on a brave face and smile and cross my fingers that tomorrow will be better, brighter and a cure or more promising therapy will be found and pray tomorrow will be a good day.

Before a Diagnosis

When I was preggo we didn't find out what I was having. It's was a surprise that everyone thought we were crazy for. The big day came 3 weeks early, and after all the phone calls and family flooding into my room, I was informed of something I knew and feared... I had to have a c-section.

Oompa loompa Robbie, and freaked out me went to surgery and out came a head full of blond hair, bright blue eyes and "a slightly distended abdomen".... With those words my mind raced and almost missed doc udder a "we have a girl!"
a girl that wasn't crying.... I felt like I panicked... I threw up, then the NICU isolette came in and I continued to panic. Izzy never cried that day. She squeaked and I almost cried.
she went into surgery 15 hours after she came into the world. Dr. Lewis worked a miracle with God's help. They saved our little girl. Izzy had a intestinal perforation due to a merconium iliest.. Greek to you too huh? All that means inutero, her intestine had a blockage and it ripped causing a big mess and 2 pounds of fluid on her abdomen. And a very unhappy brand-newborn.
Doctors in and out of my post-pardom room for the next few days and I learned alot....
1. A spinal AND epidural with some morphine makes a great cocktail of drugs that completely incapacitate you regardless of how strong your will power is it get down the hall to finally see your baby for the first time.
2. While on this cocktail you can ask intelligent questions.... 100 times but will never remember who you asked or what the answer.
3. You can't tell and aren't expected to remember your doctors verses her doctors.
4. It freaks nurses out when you don't need pain meds.
5. I'm very calm in the face of crisis and chaos and panic.
6. Goofy cocktail wears off but you still can't walk 100 feet without having to catch your breath. And you instinctively walk funky.
7. NICU nurses are amazing and I don't know what we would have done without them.
8. Robbie and I are very strong.
9. Robbie and I are very young.
10. Robbie and I are very smart.
11. Young, strong, smart and NICU hardly if ever all go in the same sentence not to mention the same couple and new parents.

5 and a half weeks in the NICU for Izzy, a week in the hospital for me, 3 surgeries between us, 2 or 3 genetic tests and several cultures and tests later and we come home with the most beautiful baby and this nagging feeling that a diagnosis is supposed to change something.

Izzy is simply a baby. Nothing more nothing less. A wonderful happy baby. She will grow up to be a toddle, then a rambunctious kid. Teen years will come and then off to college and our beautiful baby will be her own healthy happy woman. A diagnosis changes nothing.

Sleeping babies and pacifers

Can someone please tell me how a semi sleeping baby on her back can spit out a paci and it ends up over her head? Please enlighten me on the physics of that.... Otherwise I'm sticking to the notion that Izzy has magical powers that are yet to be developed.

Dinner and Diapers

 Izzy is a fat kid. Today she ate a whole Gerber 2nd foods container of carrots in one sitting AFTER having a 6 oz bottle! Oh and I put rice cereal in it.... So all that food in baby tummy translates to poo in a diaper.


Anyone who has children or has ever pooed themselves will tell you it's not a pleasant smell. Baby poo is no different. However baby CF poo is. It smells worse! I'm not exaggerating here, it's a medical fact! My beautiful little girl is now able to poo from her bum (a relatively new thing for us) and that poo is foul. CF poo is bad but her gas will run full grown men out of the room.

Tonight before bed Robbie and I were goofin around with Izzy when she made a face and pooed. We debated on who's turn it was and I ultimately changed her tiny heiny. The stench was bad, and I've often blamed Robbie for our baby's gas or even dirty diapers. Who knew an innocent little girl with blond hair and bright blue eyes could cut some that can bring tears to your eyes and run full grown men out of the room? Well I guess it comes with the territory.

Cloth and the doctor

So it's a few days past fluff friday and I've been reading TCDW blog posts and it reminded me of a recent doctor appointment with Izzy. I had her in a t-shirt and bumGenuis AIO. The nurses flipped at how cute and practical the dipe was and the doctor even commented on how cute Izzys bum was. We struck up conversation about how much money I save because of cloth and how different they are from the old fashion cloth back in the day. I was excited when the doc said her sister tried cloth, then saddened to hear the fit wasn't great. I told her about the different brands and so on and left Nemours with an accomplished "i just shared my addiction and was appreciated" glow about me. I never thought I would turn into the woman who talked about making baby food and cloth diapers and would be happy about it.... Well I guess that was my welcome party to motherhood.

The beginning of the "Doesnt Fit Her Bum" box

Bittersweet but exciting news.... Izzy has worn her extra-small bumGenuis Deluxe diapers for the last time today.... They will be taken out of fluff rotation and put away for any siblings or friends that need them. They fought a good fight, held in leaks and fit like a glove but she's finally gaining weight and has blow outs because her little tiny heiny is too big for xs now. After laundry tomorrow we will say a few words and start a "Doesnt Fit Her Bum" box.